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Patterns of protection

“Change starts with me”

Life consists of a string of moments designed to open our eyes to the reality of our direction. Unfortunately, we aren't always open to the acceptance of this reality. For that reason, we create patterns of protection and we cling to them from our subconscious. Do you find yourself repeating certain patterns, same story, just a different day? Have you ever asked yourself why, and I don't mean, "Why me"...I mean a deep soul-searching why, with intent to divulge (and accept) the truth that surfaces?

Our patterns have a perfectly designed purpose. Some patterns protect our hearts, some boost a deflated ego and many are born out of sheer necessity. They were most likely essential to survival on some level, but when do they begin to cross the boundaries of destruction? Are we capable of seeing our own destructive patterns? I'm going to go out on a limb here and suggest that if something has become a protective pattern, it's most likely cloaked like a wolf in sheep's clothing. I'm not suggesting that all patterns are destructive or protective. We can, after all, partake in healthy patterns too, but I would guess that they were conscious decisions that required self-reflection.

There is a reason most change comes arm and arm with pain. Changing patterns of protection means lifting that protective veil and consciously exposing your vulnerabilities. This is just plain uncomfortable, isn't it?! Therein lies the reason for the pattern. We don't WANT to be uncomfortable. Resistance is a common response to discomfort. In fact, we all go out of our way daily to avoid discomfort so it's no surprise that we would protect ourselves with the comfort of familiar habits. Resistance to change stems from discomfort, but ironically, this pattern has the potential to prolong and magnify the associated discomfort in the long run.

If there is one thing autism taught me (there are many actually), it's that there is no room for complacency. Complacency doesn't change anything.

"Change the way you look at things and the things you look at change."  -Wayne Dyer


We have to be willing to sit in our emotions surrounding vulnerability and to let them hang around a little bit, if we want to understand them. Our vulnerabilities are a gauge and covering them up only removes them from sight. It's natural to want to push discomfort away, to remove it from awareness, but if we are willing to recognize that pain is the result of attachment, we can begin to not only dissolve the pain, but to transcend the pattern!

Attachment is a funny thing. Being attached to an outcome means we are projecting into the future. The future is, and always will be an unknown yet we actively and regularly engage in a pattern of trying to control it. If we are to be successful at practicing mindfulness, we must remain present. How can we be in both places at once? We can't! To choose presence requires acceptance of where we are today. The good news is that by living your truth today, your future will organically unfold according to your purpose.

My own personal experiences with the growing pains of change have always resulted in the most remarkable shifts in awareness, eye-opening, life-changing acceptance. The best version of me emerges after a period of deep self reflection. If you want something in life to change, be willing to open the doors to your heart, regardless of how uncomfortable it might be.

The act of creating or even replacing habits from a conscious (and often vulnerable) state of mind has the incredible outcome of spiritual alignment within yourself.